My command of English is deteriorating drastically.

I can explain convolution of signals and modulation and demodulation very eloquently, but I can't put together a 2500 word essay on Virginia Woolf, even after laying all the facts down before me.

You know that feeling when the word you want is on the tip of your tongue but you can't, for the love of God, spit it out? That, for me, is occuring at a frequency of 3.5 sentences! I'm beyond being horrified at my own inadequacy.

I am doomed. Doomed to sentence my artistic/literary self to euthanasia. Doomed to grow white hairs which I will pathetically try to dye while staining the rims of my very thick old fashioned glasses and be cursed with a bad complexion for the rest of my engineering/scientific life. The prophetic words chanted by 9 year old boys who threw paper chalk bombs at me in pri school shall eventually be fulfilled. No one can runaway from the curse of being a nerd.

A legend's star has faded.

Half an hour ago, The Star announced the passing of one of the fathers of Malaysian Theatre - Krishen Jit.

He set the stage. He directed the show. He took his encore. And now the curtains have closed.


Theatre Legend Krishen Jit dies
Krishen Jit - Kakiseni.com
Krishen Jit - Cameronian Awards

Fare thee well, Bob II

Although you became a part of our steamed tofu dish, you are sorely missed. As Lu said, we have raised you well; it was your time to go to that big onion patch in the sky.

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Term has started. Lets get down to business. Essay due this Friday. Computer Architecture exam next week. Following that - endless weeks of mugging. I'm not telling you. I'm telling myself!

I need to blog this quickly before Lionel complains I am spending too much time typing away and annoying him with the stagnated staccatos of my keyboard (maybe it is annoying, but I can't hear anything with these earphones on, thanks to you!)

Today was a really full day. One of those days where you realise you haven't spent a single moment loitering around the house wondering what to eat next or what to surf on to next and ignoring that essay you still haven't started on. Instead I managed to do a million and one things while still ignoring that essay I haven't started on. I feel very accomplished.

Task number one was to wake up on time (the task was not to wake up, it was being on time!) and get dressed so that the two Emperor's Gate households could be taken out for a dim sum lunch by Fidel's mum. Only power restaurants like Royal China (which we all believe is being run by the Chinese/Hongkey mafia) can command a queue of more than 20 people half an hour before it's stated opening time, although I was possibly more afraid of Fidel's "we are leaving at 11am SHARP" threat than missing out on being first in line for dim sum. Lu's plan today was to reunite with his dim sum girl whom he spotted (no, actually I spotted), when we were at Royal China last friday due to his dad's treat. Yups, we have been frequent visitors of Royal China lately. It's all good when parents come to visit.

Task number two was to go to Oxford Street to get more thank you cards. I discovered that my brain doesn't really work all too well when my stomach is digesting carrot cakes and instead of walking towards Marble Arch where my favourite bookshop is, I walked towards Tottenham Court Road. Which wasn't too bad since I used the walk back to pop into several shoe shops. Couldn't decide on which one to buy because Lionel's voice of reason was booming in my head (which was along the lines of "NO! You can't buy PINK shoes! What are you going to match it with??!!")

Task number three was to marinate some chicken for tomorrow's dinner with the ISE girls. I have embarassingly FFK-ed every single ISE outing there has ever been since the dawn of man, so there's no escaping this one. What is it with me and my classmates? I used to avoid hanging out with my classmates in JC, at all costs. (Sometimes there are just small clappy things you've had enough of duling school hours itself, what more after school hours! So you can't brame me, can you???) But I do like my ISE coursemates. I really do. But I'm not all so keen on partying and boozing till dawn with them.

Task number four was to do menial errands - such as laundry. I interspersed waiting for laundry by sorting out the thank you cards to be posted off by the juniors with the programme books and DVDs. Oh and some where in between that I had dinner too, which Yi Shan cooked. God does work miracles. This is the third time Yi Shan has cooked this week. When I commented that his wife will surely thank me for house training him (makes him sound like a terrier) his reply was "Aiyah, why lah? I will surely find a wife that can cook!". Girls, beware! If you cannot cook, you are not YiShan ISO compatible. I feel sorry for Yi Shan's wife already.

Task number five was to get rid of the old bananas by making caramelised bananas with rum and cream. My household is getting fat. And I'm not helping.

And task number six is to stop blogging and finish reading the waves before my brain shuts down on me.

And just like Amar I shall end with a quote - No se ría de las cotizaciones de Amar

Why would you want to do this?
Bets open on Benedict's successor

What kind of morbid fanaticism has encouraged the world to place bets on the papacy as if it were the World Cup?!

Lu cleaned the 'other' bathroom today. The corridor has stopped smelling of wet dogs. It's a shame Lu had to clean it just 4 days after Yi Shan was supposed to have cleaned it. No prizes for guessing who does a better job.

The next time I make stew and let it cook in the crock pot for 3 hours, I promise I will not:
1. go on a tomato frenzy, because boiled tomatoes are not as sweet as popping them into my mouth raw
2. finish of the remains of the spanish red wine by pouring it all into the stew.
3. forget to add more cinnamon.

I want to make caramel bananas, chocolate chip cookies and finish reading 'The Waves' all at the same time.

I've had it with all things intellectual (my current Communications II notes inclusive). This blog shall return to the nonsensical trivial stuff I'm so used to spouting.

3 books arrived today in a BIG box with BIG bubble wrap. Unfortunately it wasn't the pop-able kind. Looked more like toddler arm-floats. Anyway back to the books. There was Bill Clinton: My Life for Lu, The Oxford Dictionary of Classical Myth and Religion for Lionel and Spike Milligan's A Children's Treasury of Milligan for me. All for 7 pounds. More books for our bookshelf! Including the entire set of Peguin Book Great Ideas for 10 pounds. Yups, that's 20 books for 10 pounds! I'm pretty engrossed in the Spike Milligan. I've loved his insanity since I was 6 years old. I swear my kids will grow up on Milligan and Roald Dahl instead of Mother Goose and Enid Blyton and sing about cows that go Bong! and monkeys that say Boo!. It will definitely boost a healthy imagination.

I have one more essay to do to wrap up my Literature course. Virginia Woolf and mordenism. It would be so very very interesting if my mind wasn't saturated with AM and FM and source coding and entropy. No, signals and Virginia Woolf aren't good bedfellows. Even if I end up reading both of them in bed.
Most of the time.
All of the time.

The MNite DVD is out. I don't know how much it costs yet, but you are very welcome to pay me what you think it is worth. Around the range of 10 - 15 pounds will do. We're not merciless profit makers. (I'm kidding, it should be less than 5 pounds). I don't know if I'm excited or apprehensive about watching my baby as an audience instead of a crew member. My family has already watched it, and they loved it (because I wrote it... they are so supportive...) but my mother always overexaggerates when she's praising me, so I'm keeping my expectations low. Oh alright, medium.

Oh yeah, and maybe I'll just mention it here that Prof Constantinides accepted me for a UROP project for DSP algorithms, so I won't be back in Malaysia or Singapore till September. Please don't hit me! It's not that I don't want to go home, I do! Ever so much! But it isn't that easy to get a UROP project especially in a topic I'm ever so interested in (yes, I'm nuts! but digital signal processing *is* CooL! end of story!) and I just have to try this out so I know what to do for my 3rd and 4th year. I'll bring back chocolates. Forgive me yet? Charme, Sher... I swear we'll finally meet up and have that oh-so-long bitching session we've been needing so badly!

Alright. I'm tired. Another day has passed and I probably didn't know it.

From the Catholic Society at Imperial College:

Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger, former Prefect of the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith, and Dean of the College of Cardinals, has been elected as our new Pope. Let us pray that he may guide us faithfully.

The prayer for the new Pope as distributed by the Vatican is as follows:

God our Father, shepherd and guide,
look with love on Pope Benedict XVI, your servant,
the pastor of the Church.

May his word and example
inspire and guide the Church,
and may he, and all those entrusted to his care,
come to the joy of everlasting life.

Grant this through our Lord Jesus Christ, your Son,
who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit,
one God for ever and ever.

Amen

My humble thoughts for today:

1. Britney Spears, a mum-to-be at the age of 23, still seems like a little girl who doesn't know what or who she wants to be. From heralded sweet young thing to 'can't-give-her-the-time-of-day' trashy vamp, she's not unlike some other little girls I know who have no direction of where they want to go.

2. According to a Minister in the Prime Minister's department, bibles in Bahasa Malaysia and Bahasa Indonesia are banned. Really? But I grew up learning worship songs in Malay. And sometimes we recite the Lord's prayer in Malay. And well... alright, I would still rather read the bible in English... but I'm thinking of Margaret Ebon, the Kadazan-Dusun guide we had during Odac's Trusmadi-Kinabalu expedition in Sabah. She told me she was a Christian, but she spoke to me in Malay, just like every other Kadazan-Dusun I met. I remember her English being simple and enough to get by, and I respect - enough to keep up her faith. I'm sure she'd appreciate a Malay bible, in line with the religious tolerances of our country.

3. They want to change the name of George Town to what??? A Seberang Jaya state assemblyman has called for my mother's hometown to be renamed Bandar Datuk Abdullah Fatim to rid it of it's colonial past. Besides, the name 'George Town' is hardly used by the locals and is only used in official government documents and geography textbooks (where? I don't recall learning much about George Town at all. Actually I learnt more about it in history than in geography!). A USM Humanities Lecturer Prof. Dr Muhammad Hj Salleh (is this the same MHS whose poems we used to study in Eng. Lit?) probably thinking that the state government is as usual being too rash about this sort of trivial things they love to do, and asked that a study be done to find a more befitting name for our beloved historic state (well, I love it more for its food than it's history) like Tanjung or Tanjung Penegri as the locals call it. But please, please, pleeease... can we not change Gurney Drive to Tan Sri Wong Pow Nee Drive and Macallister Road to Jalan Arumugampillai?

Mails for MSoc rarely come my way these days, but sometimes one or two ignorant senders do happen to think I'm still the MSoc secretary and today I received this from the Majlis Syura Muslimun UK & Eire, which is possibly the stupidest request I ever heard.

Assalamualaikum

MSM is planning to forward a Press Statement representing all UK malaysian societies (NGOs, student societies, malaysian societies) to the relevant parties, hopefully this Tuesday. The issue is to raise concern and to oppose the proposal by Sisters in Islam and "Jawatankuasa Kaukus Parlimen" which will be very detrimental to the Muslim in Malaysia.

We believe that even though we are all in the UK, we should voice our stand as it will impact our lives and family especially when we go back to Malaysia.

As such, I call upon all societies to join us in this issue. We all should stand together regardless of differences, if any. The draft press release is being finalised and all societies are invited to support it. We will include your relevant societies details at the end of the press release if you agree.

The sample of draft press release will be uploaded to our newly launced MSM Weblog by tomorrow night. Please have a read at: http://msmukeire.blogspot.com/

If you agree to include your societies details as to support our stand, please email to both of my email addresses (zifri78@hotmail.com and zifri.baharudin@csfb.com) the following:

---- Irrelevant details section deleted to facillitate reading (dulcinea) ----

I do hope to receive your positive response, if possible by Monday midnight.

Thank you

on behalf of Majlis Syura Muslimun UK & Eire

Zifri Baharudin
CREDIT | FIRST
SUISSE | BOSTON

---- Contact details deleted (dulcinea) ----

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Dijangkakan, sekurang-kurangnya 10,000 orang umat Islam akan berhimpun di Masjid Kg. Baru, sebagai menyatakan bantahan terhadap tuntutan dan keangkuhan Sisters In Islam dan Jawatankuasa Kaukus Parlimen yang mana antara intipati tuntutan mereka adalah;

1. Menuntut agar Undang-undang yang bertujuan mengawal moral masyarakat dimansuhkan termasuklah semua undang-undang diperingkat Kebangsaan, Negeri dan kerajaan Tempatan.
2. Menuntut agar kuasa Mufti-mufti dikaji dan dihapuskan.
3. Menuntut agar kerajaan mengiktiraf kebebasan beragama dalam Negara ini, dalam erti kata lain membenarkan Umat Islam yang ingin keluar dari Islam mengistiharkan kermurtadan mereka secara terbuka tanpa campurtangan Mahkamah Syariah.
4. Mendesak agar pihak Jabatan Pendaftaran Negara menghapuskan pernyataan status Agama dalam kad pengenalan, bagi memudahkan Umat Islam mengsistiharkan Kemurtadan mereka.
5. Membenarkan agama lain memberikan pandangan dan mempersoalkan cara hidup dan akidah umat Islam melalui cadangan mereka menubuhkan Majlis Perundingan Antara Agama (ICM).
6. Mendesak agar pihak Jabatan Agama tidak campurtangan dalam urusan peribadi Umat Islam di Malaysia termasuklah dalam tatacara berpakaian, pergaulan dan cara hidup, walaupun ianya bertentangan dengan hukum Islam seperti tidak menutup aurat, tidak bersembahyang dan berpuasa atau melakukan maksiat seperti judi, minum arak dan zina atas dasar menjaga hak asasi manusia.


Sorry that I wasn't able to translate it, but for those of you who understand just enough Malay, you'd be just as baffled as I am. Here is a society whose members have been educated abroad, exposed to different cultures, backgrounds and religions (I hope, unless they have been abiding by 'kampung syndrome' rules) and yet are ready to oppose freer and fairer ruling in Malaysia without the intervention of Islamic laws in our multi-racial, multi-religious community.

I also thought it seemed a little silly to call for such an urgent press conference without giving any real references that the claims above were true. So I did my own little research and found even more baffling and downright ridiculous news articles (like this one: Harakah Daily). When, when, WHEN will my country be free from such oppressive zealots? Who claim that the fall of morality in our society is due to our laws not being restrictive enough. That only the laws of Islam will be able to cultivate a perfectly moral society. Funny enough that almost every case of rape in the news for the past few years has been committed by a Muslim. Repression and oppression has never worked and never will. Am I going to watch my country's laws change from humanitarian to ultra-utilitarian? Please, no!

Bob the Christmas tree has now been replaced with our new pet - Bob II 

It's time I stopped taking a gamble with my exams.
I know this is futile, but I have to say it:

I vow to study till my eye bags are as dark as coal and my coffee mug is stained to the rim and my pens run out of ink!

Tambah minyak... banyak banyak...

1 mug of Nescafe vanilla coffee - check!
1 playlist saturated with enough counting crows, damien rice and lene marlin - check!
1 desklamp to shine hope in the darkness - check!
1 knee-high stack of math books and notes - check!

Think that's good enough to bury myself away for the next two weeks. If I'm lucky I'll be able to move away the math notes and replace them with Signals and Systems in a few days. Depending on efficiency.

It's the Maomao fund!! Alex (or maomao as many here lovingly call him) will soon be able to make his way back to London, after he returned to Singapore last June on completion of his exchange year. With all the spare change that mysteriously turns up around the house, I'm sure we can collect enough coppers to buy you an air ticket back here in about a few years. You'll have to pay for your own return ticket though...  

This is how much money we have collected... enough to bring maomao from Heathrow to Gloucester Road by tube. 

I love spur of the moment museum sight-seeing! Our museum of choice today was the National Art Gallery (which is currently housing Carravaggio: The Final Years). And when they say advance booking is recommended to guarantee entry, they mean it! (for Carravaggio that is, not the gallery; what self respecting UK museum has entrance fees? The Tower and Madame Tussaud's NOT inclusive, and not on my preference list either!)
Lionel and I decided some time around noon that we'd go to the National Gallery today. At about 3pm we finally detached ourselves from work and tried to get going. At about four something we made it out of the door, with Lu, Amar and Yi Shan saying he'd catch up later. At about 5pm we finally made it to the National Gallery only to find Carravaggio SOLD OUT! Like what the hell? (We're allowed to say that because on the 1st wednesday of each month the museums are opened till 9pm, but I suppose we weren't the only ones who were capitalising on this).
So, well, no Carravaggio. Instead we got to browse through (yippee!) Monet, Canaletto (my current favourite for being able to show off very detailed and very fine brush strokes), Seurat, Titian, Leornado, Michaelangelo, Raphael (yes, Yi Shan, those are the ninja turtles) and loads more.
We had to leave the museum at about 8pm, because Amar was whining, and headed over to some Japanese restaurant near Piccadilly where we stuffed ourselves on sashimi and bentos. The last time I ever felt so full was when we were guiltily indulging on Misato and gelatos with Luke! I think we grow fat everytime someone comes to London to visit.
I'm not very sure I'm studying as efficiently as I am eating and sight seeing. Double integrals - what art thou?

One year on... and still very much in love with you...
Even if we didn't make it to Belgos
And dates turn into group tours
Muaks!

As the pope draws closer to returning to God, I am joining the billion Catholics all over the world who are praying for the peace and serenity of the Holy Father in his journey back to the arms of Christ. As one of the priests said, he is dying the same way he lived - courageously.
It is hard to see the passing of a pope; it isn't something you imagine you will live through. His voice, though distant, has always been one of moral comfort in a disturbed world; a blanket of security that was not extremist and yet would not condone the deadly sins the modern world has blatantly accepted. He dared to speak out. He dared to confront.
And then I ask myself why sometimes it is so hard for me to bravely play the part of a Christian that I should.

For the pope who was a strong Marian supporter, I have only this humble prayer:

Ave Maria, gratia plena, Dominus tecum.
Benedicta tu in mulieribus,
et benedictus fructus ventris tui, Iesus.
Sancta Maria, Mater Dei,
ora pro nobis peccatoribus, nunc,
et in hora mortis nostrae.
Amen.